Learning to be Content in Ministry

I've heard it said, "The Grass is Greener where you water it." As I have grown older and (hopefully) wiser, I have realized the truth of this statement. It holds more truth than the old saying, "The grass isn't always greener on the other side." The grass is not always greener, but it is certainly greener where you water it, cultivate it, and encourage growth. This has taken me years to understand. It all boils down to one word for me - contentment. Learning to be content in ministry and in the situation where I have been put. 

Early on in my ministry I was chasing the next big thing. I wanted the celebrity status as a Youth Minister. I wanted to be known for the work that I was doing. I wanted to be invited to speak at the big youth events. I wanted to brag about the events that I planned or was a part of via committees or board appointments. I wanted to the pats on the back. I wanted the recognition. I wanted to bring positive change to the youth ministry and the church. I lived for my glory. I would look at other Youth Ministers and think that I was not doing enough... In doing so, I worked tirelessly. The calendar was full. There were long days and long nights, often at the sacrifice of my family. The recognition didn't come. I worked for 3 congregations in 4 years. I was far from a celebrity and about two and half years ago I was humbled, I was brought low, and I was asked to resign. If you read the last paragraph, you noticed there was a lot of I and not enough God. I see so many ministers and youth ministers hustling to provide or plan the next big thing - I know that life - it's dangerous. Selfish ambition, the comparison game, and chasing the next big thing can lead to burnout and disappointment.

Contentment and the art of learning to be content has not been an easy road. In fact, I still find myself at times fighting the selfish desires versus what God is wanting from my life and ministry. Then, I read the book of Philippians and Paul hit me with some truth bombs. 

No matter who receives the recognition - Christ is being proclaimed (Philippians 1:12-18)

I had to accept that there are others who are more equipped than I to speak to young people at different events and that's okay - Christ is being proclaimed. That does not change the fact that I get to spend every week with the students who are sitting in front of me. I had to realize that the most important thing I could do was to provide to the students a study of God's word and help them to understand how life-changing the scriptures can be. I get to spend more time teaching God's word than the every now and then speaker at an event - I get to have a greater, deeper spiritual impact on these students. It is my prayer each time that God receives the glory, because I am nothing without God.

Be an Encourager (Philippians 1:3-11)

Could you imagine being an encourager while you are sitting under the watch of Roman guard? That's exactly what Paul does! He encourages the people of Philippi through his prayer of thanksgiving. He, also, takes a moment to encourage them to continue living for Christ while being pure and blameless, filled with the motivation to do the right thing. Now, could you imagine being an encourager when you don't agree with leadership or you are dealing with difficult people? That's exactly what you need to do. I am not always the best of this, but I try to make it my purpose to encourage others even when things might not be going my way. You know what happens? You receive encouragement through your encouragement. I feel uplifted when I have opportunities to encourage others. It's possible that you will receive encouragement from others because of your encouraging spirit. 

Find the Positive (Philippians 2:14-18)

Paul is awaiting to hear if he will receive the death penalty. He is unsure of his fate; however, he knows where he will spend eternity. Either way is fine with Paul (Phil. 1:21). Paul continues to encourage the Philippians to "rejoice and be glad" with Paul. How can anyone find the positive in this situation? Maybe you have faced similar situations where you walked out of an Elder's meeting feeling completely defeated... how do we even find the positive? It's possible you have had conversations with very difficult people who would rather tear you down than build you up - do they even have any positives? To dwell on the negative can be very detrimental to your ministry. It can cause resentment and angry to build up while your mind begins to think that the grass maybe greener somewhere else. The church is the body of Christ which is made up of imperfect people. There will be no perfect situation. Every congregation has their problems. Let's take our blinders off and begin to look for the positives. In looking for the positives, you will see opportunities to help the church grow, as well. 

Be Christ-Like. Be Humble. (Philippians 2:3-11)

Want to understand humility? Examine the life of Christ. It's hard to believe that the Son of God willingly gave up His spot on the throne knowing that His fate would be sealed in a cruel fate upon a criminal's cross. Paul reminds the people of Philippi that in order to be like Christ, we must learn to be humble. We must learn to put other's interests above our own, to count others are more valuable than ourselves. You want to see your life turn towards God? Take yourself out of the equation. Me, Myself, and I was my main focus when my focus should have been on God, family, and the students that needed a minister. It's okay to admit when you are wrong. It's important to humble yourself and submit to your Elders, even if you disagree. It's important to humble yourself and be changed by God. The result of Jesus Christ humbling Himself? "God has highly exalted him and bestowed on him the name that is above every name, so that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father." (Phil. 2:9-11)

Find Strength in Christ (Philippians 4:11-13)

How can Paul endure the strife, the arrests, the difficult people, the trials and tribulations in his life that seemingly happened over and over again? (2 Cor. 11:23-28) His strength came from the Lord. Paul was able to be content "in whatever situation" because he allowed Christ to be the King of his life. This allowed Paul to have the strength to preach the gospel despite the possibility of persecution. In whatever situation, we must learn to be content knowing that our battle is God's battle. Strength will be provided to us in the midst of the battle. Due to the strength Paul had through Christ, it did not cause him to run when things got tough. Finding strength in Christ will allow us to tough it out when we want to give up, when we want to look for other opportunities, and when we are in a season of trials. Believe me, Satan wants us to run in those situations - those are often the times when ministers leave congregations in a blaze of glory and take out everyone in their path. I pray that you will take a step back, look at the bigger picture, and realize that you are in a momentary affliction. God is still good to you and will provide the strength you need.

Let me encourage you, find contentment in the work you are a part of. The church only thrives and grows when its members and ministers remain committed to the cause of Christ. The grass is truly greener where you water it - let's quit looking for greener pastures and focus on cultivating the one in front of us.

Andrew Thompson is the Youth Minister at Lebanon Road Church of Christ in Nashville, TN. Andrew is incredibly grateful to God for the opportunity to minister to families and students. He is supported by a wonderful wife, Joy (who is out of his league!) and a two year old son, Henderson (no relation to Freed-Hardeman). Graduating from the University of Alabama was a life-long dream while following in the footsteps of his parents. If you've ever been around Andrew, you know that he has a master's in sarcasm which leads to having a dry sense of humor. Remember: God is Good, All the Time!

Don't Blink

"Don't Blink. Life moves faster than you think."

As many begin to prepare to spend time with their families over the next few days and celebrate Thanksgiving, I am reminded at just how short life is. My family and I will approach the "first" of many "firsts" on Thursday. This will be the first Thanksgiving that my mom will not be with us. However, I don't dwell on this because I am sad (I selfishly am sad). In fact, I am happy because she is home and home is where my heart is, home is where I long to be. There is nothing that I look forward to most than meeting my God, my Savior, and my intercessor. I can tell you that my treasure is Heaven and that is where my heart is (Matt. 6:21).

Thanksgiving was always a fun time of year for our family, no matter which side of the family we were visiting. We always knew we could start our thanksgiving meal once our mom arrived because she was usually the last one there. Although, occasionally, she would throw us off and by being there early. Thanksgiving was one of the few time we would see all of our cousins during the year (aside from Christmas). Being silly, enjoying food and fellowship, playing games were some of the things we enjoyed. Most of all, I enjoy being surrounded by my family and the people I love (to which I don't say that often enough).

I always enjoy this time of year because I like to look back on all the things I have to be thankful for and all the ways that God has richly blessed me.

1. I am thankful for my creator (God) who gave me life and loved me enough to allow Jesus (God's son) to stand in my place and bear my sins.
2. I am thankful that I was able to spend 28 years with my mom. Some do not get to spend that much time with their mothers.
3. I am thankful that my mom is with our Heavenly Father. 
4. I am thankful for a wife who loves me despite my struggles and downfalls.
5. I am thankful for a dad who I can call at anytime for advice or just to talk about life. 
6. I am thankful for a brother who I have grown to be so proud of. He's doing great things for the kingdom!
7. I am thankful for a job that I love so much. It's more of a blessing than a job... because I LOVE what I do!
8. I am thankful for family. Family that loves me, supports me, and is always encouraging to me even if we don't get to see each other very often. 
9. I am thankful for friends. How in the world would I have gotten through these last four months without friends?
10. I am thankful for a church family. You don't know how truly blessed you are to have a church family until you are in need of them and then they rally around you, support you, and make sure things are taken care of. If you don't have a church family, find one! It's one of the greatest things in the world. 
11. I am most thankful that my citizenship is in Heaven. "...our citizenship is in heaven, and from it we await a Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ, 21 who will transform our lowly body to be like his glorious body, by the power that enables him even to subject all things to himself." - Philippians 3:20-21.

This Thanksgiving I encourage you to hug your loved ones just a little longer, make sure to say, "I Love You", and enjoy the moments while you can. There is coming a day where we will be separated from the ones we love, so make it count while you are able.

I will miss my mom's smile and laugh on Thanksgiving, but I will never forget the wonderful Thanksgiving memories that we made. Cherish your time with each other, make beautiful memories, and be thankful for many things! We are truly blessed!

Learning in Grief: Trust God

*Disclaimer: It's possible that this post will ramble, make loops, take turns, and repeat itself as I try to effectively put in to words what I am trying to say. I hope through it all that the overall message will be heard.

Almost two months ago, as you may know, I lost my mother suddenly and unexpectedly to death. One thing that we can expect in life is death, but we don't always know when it will occur or how (Romans 5:12). The events surrounding death and the days/years after can be a somewhat confusing time. It can be a detrimental time for people who especially are lacking in their faith.

It has not been an easy time, in particular, for myself. I struggle with questions that I will never get an answer to, the phone calls and texts that I can't make, the holidays that will forever be different, moments and new memories that won't be shared together, and I could go on and on.

Yesterday was a big struggle for me. We received the autopsy results from my mom's death; however, it was not what I expected. There cause of death: undetermined. UNDETERMINED? Something had to have happened to cause a 48 year old to pass away in her sleep, right? Through the many tears that I cried last night, I realized - God is in control. The autopsy report does not and will not determine my mom's eternal resting place. Would it have been great to have gotten answers? Yes! But, God is in control.

Many people write blogs, lessons and sermons on what they learned through grief, so I naturally assumed I would have one of these, as well. I tried to force myself to write one not too long ago, to no avail. It wasn't until last night that things began clicking. This morning I sat reading different things and I came across an Instagram post with Psalm 55:22, "Cast your burden on the Lord and He will sustain you..." Wow! What a powerful thought. As I think back over the two months, that was exactly what was happening. (I don't say this to boast) Despite my struggles with the mundane things of life and worldly desires, I have never questioned God as to why my mother had to leave this life.

TRUST GOD

I've known this all along but now I have a deeper understanding of what that really means. God has taken care of me and my family in so many ways over the last two months. We forget to seek God in all that we do and sometimes miss just how He is working in our lives and blessing us so richly.

Proverbs 3:5 - "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding."

God is so much bigger and powerful than I am - He works in ways we cannot even see. God can do things beyond our imagine and comprehension (Eph. 3:20). Yet, in our darkest days is when we typically abandon God - we abandon Him at the exact moment that His light and glory can shine for all to see. We forget that God walks with us each step of the way, even through our darkest valleys, to guide us and comfort us (Psalm 23:4).

Romans 8:28 - "All things work together for the good of those who love the Lord, and are called according to His purpose."

Trusting God helps us to realize that in the end God wins! We are told that evil+good = good all the time! What usually happens is we ask God to be on our timing, but in reality we need to trust in God's timing. He won't always show us the good right away - it could be several years down the road. You need to know, understand, and trust that God has NEVER broken a promise. If He says it, God means it! If God says, I will turn around your dark times to make something good, then we must love God and trust God. However, what this verse doesn't say is that good will always happen to us. The verse says good will happen, but it may not always directly affect us. God is good. God is love. He will show that to us, if we trust in Him.

Psalm 55:22 - " Cast your burden on the Lord and He will sustain you; He will never permit the righteous to be shaken."

If we trust in God, we will trust Him with our cares and burdens that we face in life. We will realize that we can't do it alone and allow God to take care of us. What I love about this verse is the last part, God will not allow His people to be shaken. Death can really shake our faith at times. We may turn to the one who has answers and question God. "Why? Why would God allow this to happen?" Really the question is, why are we questioning God? We, humans, are sinful beings. It was because of sin that death became a part of this world. Sin brought forth death, yet we question the one who hates sin and hated it so much that He destroyed the world once before. Does God have the power to eliminate sin? Of course, but God WANTS us to love Him. He WANTS us to have freewill. God does not want to force us to follow Him and to love Him. In fact, God doesn't even need us. It is us who need God. It is us who need to TRUST GOD and cast our cares/burdens on Him. He is the only one who can truly handle it. God's love for us allows Him to do things that will permit us from having our faith shaken to the core IF we cast our burdens on Him. If we do, two things will happen:

1. God will sustain us.

2. He will not allow us to be shaken.

Will the days get easier? Trusting in God will help me through. Maybe it was simply that God granted mom's wish to peacefully pass away in her sleep and it was her time. Yes, I have questions as to why it was her time, but God is in control. Remember in Genesis 5:24 - Enoch walked closely with God, but then God decided to take Enoch home.

Maybe the autopsy was undetermined to save me from stressing and worrying about possibly family medical history, because I would worry since my mother was so young. Now, I don't have anything to worry about medically speaking.

There will always be many questions that I won't receive answers to but God has given me the answer that I need when it comes to life and eternal life. He is reserving the greatest gift for me - eternal life (Rom. 6:23)! The secret things belong to the Lord (Deut. 29:29) and He gives me all the answers that I need, so that I can live for God each day and serve Him to the fullest.

Psalm 18:2 - “The LORD is my rock, and my fortress, and my deliverer; my God, my strength, in whom I will trust; my buckler, and the horn of my salvation, and my high tower.”

God is Good - All the Time! (Not some of the time, but ALL of the time)

UPDATE: My grandmother looked at the autopsy report and determined that if my mother continued living that she would eventually have a battle with small cell carcinoma where she would have suffered greatly and most likely lost the battle. She was spared pain and suffering. God is good!

Remembering A Mother's Love

The following is the manuscript of the eulogy that I gave at my mother's funeral on Friday, July 17, 2015. I hope this brings comfort and peace to those who are grieving and healing from my mother's death. She was a beautiful person inside and out.

Salibonani! - Most of you don't know what that means but this is how you greeted one another in Zimbabwe. My mom was so happy that Joy and I were over there serving the Lord that she loved so much.

First of all, let me say Thank You on behalf of my brother and I for the continuous prayers that have been lifted up during this difficult time. We have been overwhelmed with the outpouring of love, encouragement, and support that has been offered to us over the last few days. It has been a difficult process but with each day it gets better as we receive peace and comfort from the only one who can provide that to us, our heavenly father. It’s not easy finding out news when you are on the other side of the Atlantic Ocean with limited communication and unable to offer help and support to your family. Thank you for all those who stepped in and provided love to my family when I could not. I don’t know how anyone gets through a tragedy like this without a church family but most importantly God. He has provided so much comfort to my family in our time of need. My church family from Rose Hill has surrounded me and Joy with love. When we found out the news on Monday, the mission team from Rose Hill immediately surrounded Joy and I to pray for us. Then, we were surrounded again at 5am on Tuesday as we began our journey home. There is nothing more comforting than to know that so many people are praying for us in this time of need. How do we get through something like this? We know that my mom is in a much better place now and she is singing loud with the angels up in Heaven. Is it hard? No doubt! Does it hurt? More than most of you will ever know. Will it get better? Absolutely! As Johnny put on Facebook this morning, the Christian life is not meant to be lived alone and that has certainly been evident over the last few days. Johnny shared a quote by Jay Guin that says, "Church is not about the order in which we say the opening prayer versus the announcements or whether we use a piano to accompany our singing. Church is about loving each other enough to avoid the dangers, temptations, and lies of sin so that no one dies in the desert and we all enter the promised land together. I mean, what fun would Heaven be if our friends weren't with us?" I'm so glad I have a church family to help me each step of the way. If you don't have one, I encourage you to find one. Having a spiritual family to lean on is some of the best peace and comfort you can have outside of the peace and comfort God gives to us.

The Lord tells us in Jeremiah 29:11 that He knows the plan He has for us - It’s not always easy to trust in God’s plan but in times like these we have to know that God does have a plan and that good will come from this tragedy. I don’t know what the plan is or when it will reveal itself, but I know God will take care of all us in the days ahead and in His time God will reveal what He wants us to know. One my mom’s favorite verses was Romans 8:28, “All things work together for the good of those who love the Lord, and are called according to His purpose.” My mom loved our God and I know good will come from this situation. Will the good happen to me or you? We don’t know but God says that He will take the hurt, the sadness, and turn it in to good. Who knows? Maybe the good is some of her friends and family coming to know the Lord in the upcoming days or weeks. I don’t know what it is but I am going to trust in God that He will take care of us and I ask that you will do the same. God is an awesome and good God. Trust in Him - even when it is difficult.

So many of you have shared verses with us over the last few days - these verses have provided a lot of comfort to us. The biggest struggle when something like this happens is what to say and so many of you have said that there are no words that will bring comfort to us and that is true. I don’t even have to words to say to express how I felt but sharing God’s word with us is very comforting. Isaiah 41:10 says, “fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you; I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” Never have I questioned God, if it was up to Him there would be no death in this world but because of sin, death entered the world. I know God has been with me and my family each step of the way and He has provided me strength in the most difficult of situations. After being rescued from his enemies and from the hand of Saul, David writes in Psalm 18:2 - “The Lord is my rock and my fortress and my deliverer, my God, my rock, in whom I take refuge, my shield, and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold.” What an awesome rock we have to lean on in tough times - just like David I choose to take refuge in my God who can deliver me from the hand of the evil one as I fight the many different emotions that run deep during my mother’s death. Jeremiah says during a difficult time in 32:17 - “’Ah, Lord God! It is you who have made the heavens and the earth by your great power and by your outstretched arm! Nothing is too hard for you.” Nothing is too hard for God - what a humbling thought. It’s not too hard for God to strengthen us during this difficult time of loss. It’s not too hard for God to walk with us while comforting us and providing us peace. It’s not too hard for God to speak through me today, so that I can share with you just a little about my mom. Are we shocked and saddened by her death? Yes, but she would want us to smile at the memories we have of her and it’s is not too hard for God to help us to look back on all the great times and be thankful for the legacy she left behind and the time we did have with her. “The Lord God is my strength. My Bravery. He will walk me through places of trouble and suffering.” God is good. All the time.

My mom loved to sing - she was always walking around the house singing a tune. That tune usually was “Swing Low, Sweet Chariot.” I don’t know what it was about that song that caused her to continually singing but as my brother so eloquently put on Facebook - “The sweet chariot my mother used to sing about swung low to take her home.” If you ever sat in church with her, you could pick out her disctinct soprano, almost operatic, voice. She loved to sing praises to God and did not care what others around her thought of her singing - Of course, it didn’t really matter because she had such a beautiful voice. While she may have loved singing, the sermons didn’t always keep her awake. I remember growing up she might doze off during a sermon and someone would wake her up and her common response was, “I was just checking my eyelids for holes.” One of the most amazing things about mine and Joy’s mission trip to Zimbabwe was the singing by the african people. I know she would have loved to hear their natural four part harmony and I was so glad I was able to share just a little of the video I had with her so she could hear the singing. Although that singing was some of the most beautiful I have ever heard, it does not compare to the singing that my Mom is a part of in Heaven right now. I know she is loving every note. She always had a song in her heart and had a song for every situation. Her life could have easily been a musical. She enjoyed her passion for singing with the Decatur Civic Chorus whether it was in musicals or in the choral concerts. I can’t put into words the joy that singing brought to her life.

She would, on occasion, challenge me to try and do new things. One of those things was theatre. I remember in High School we decided we were going to audition for a musical with Decatur Civic Chorus, so I went with her to the auditions. However, I backed out. I can remember her being upset with me because she wanted to do the show with me. She was cast in the show and come to find out later they needed some extra male actors. So, I went and enjoyed it. So, the next year we decided to audition for the show, again… Well, again… I decided to back out but filled extra spots after the audition. My senior year, I went through with the audition and received one of the lead roles - She was so proud to share the stage with me, but not just me - my brother, James, joined us on stage for that show, also. It was a family affair. Ironically, because she shared the love of theatre with me - I met my wife because of theatre.

Mom also encouraged me to become a song leader. She wanted to share her passion for singing with me. So, I tried my hand at it and now I have a passion for singing. Just like my mom, I know a song for every situation and find myself singing often. Most importantly, I love to sing praises to God and lead others in their worship to God. If it had not been for her pushing me to explore that talent, I don’t think I would be a song leader today.

On Saturday was the last time I got to talk to my mom. We face timed with her from Zimbabwe, so we could tell her about all the great things that had been going on because she had supported us throughout the whole planning process leading up to the trip. I wanted to share with her all that we were doing and all that we were learning. I told her that on Monday evening we were going to a place called the BOMA to eat supper where we would have traditional african food and entertainment. I told her that we could eat a worm there and receive a certificate for it. I had told mom that I wasn’t sure if I would do that and she kept giving me a hard time and encouraging me to eat the worm. I remember her saying, “you should try it and bring the certificate home to show us” Well, mom, I did it - I ate that worm (which wasn’t too bad) and I have the certificate to prove it. (show certificate) That was for you mom. Thank you for encouraging me to do things that made me get out of my comfort zone. I am better off because of it.

Mom was always so supportive of the things I was doing. Whether it was playing sports, acting, or youth ministry, she was always encouraging me along the way. Whenever we would talk or text, the conversation always led in to all the things that I was involved in and how she was so proud of the work that I was doing. One particular time she was bragging on my use of social media in ministry, and told me I needed to put a presentation together to share with other ministers and churches. Come to find out, she used what I was doing as example for what she thought their youth minister was doing. You know, James and I could do no wrong in her eyes because a mother’s love for her children runs deep. We weren’t perfect children or even to get along with sometimes but she loved us anyways. She supported us always in everything that we did and are doing. Mom and I shared a love for technology and social media. We would commonly talk about the church website that she was in charge of and give each other tips on how to improve our perspective websites and social media use for ministry.

While we couldn’t do any wrong, that wasn’t always the case for Granny. I would spend the night with Granny because this was when I could go off and rent wrestling videos to watch without my mom’s knowledge - but somehow she always found out that Granny would let me watch them and then she would tell Granny, “you know I don’t let Andrew watch wrestling” and Granny would say, “Yeah but he is at my house and I said it was okay” Needless to say, my mom still let me stay over at Granny’s even though she knew I would rent wrestling videos to watch. The last instruction she would always give me before I went to Granny’s was, “do not ask Granny if you can go rent any of the wrestling movies” …. Well, let’s just say I never followed  that last instruction. If I was at Granny’s - I was going to watch wrestling movies. Sorry mom!

One thing I greatly appreciated about mom was her constant perseverance, especially in the teaching profession. In Philippians, Paul talked about not looking behind but continuing to press forward toward the prize. Paul knew perseverance and so did Mom. For any of you in the teaching profession you know how hard it is to sometimes find a job, so my mom would take sub jobs, long term substitution jobs, maternity leaves, or whatever to try and get her foot in the door. Often times, she would get a job and have it for a year or two but as you well know, if you are a non-tenured teacher and teacher units are being cut, then you are at risk at losing your job. However, she did not allow that to slow her down - she would look for a new job because she loved teaching kids. She had a passion for sharing her knowledge with the students in her classroom. She eventually would get her masters degree in Library Sciences where she could combine her love for teaching with her love for books and share with students who came through her library. She was at her happiest when she was teaching or working in a library. Many times she could have given up on the teaching profession, but kept pressing on. Even if the job wasn’t in a classroom, she found jobs where she could use her teaching experience. I always admired her perseverance because when life knocked her down - she got back up, dusted herself off, and kept moving forward. I challenge you tonight - while today is not easy, dust yourself off, and keep moving forward. Do not live in the past - that is not what mom would have wanted you to do. She would want you to focus your eyes on the end prize - that’s Heaven so that she can share with us whenever our time comes to leave this world.

There were many times were I wanted to quit different sports and teams or other activities but mom would always tell me, "we have paid too much money for you to quit. So, go back in there and keep practicing because you're not quitting." That's how she loved her life - with a no quit attitude and that was displayed in every aspect of her life.

While my mom was perseverant, she had a competitive side to her. She loved and i mean LOVED playing games - card games, board games, video games. If it had game in the name, she wanted to play it. Every holiday she looked forward to sitting around the table and playing games with the family. I think she looked forward to that more than she did opening presents at Christmas. It wasn’t that she just wanted to play the games, she also wanted to win. She played to win each and every time - sometimes challenging rules along the way (if it was to her advantage). Mom always had an eye for new and unique games. Almost every Christmas, she would call me ahead of time and tell me about a new game she had found that she wanted to play during Christmas. This last Christmas I got to share a new game with her called “Quelf”. She enjoyed it so much, she insisted we play another round… even though it was already 11pm. Needless to say, we did not play that round… Whenever someone says, let’s play one more round, just go for it… you never know when it might be the last round.

Her love for board games was accompanied with her love for family. I can’t tell you how much she loved her family. She loved spending time with her family no matter how immediate or distant they were. She just loved family time together especially during the holidays. When I talked to her on Saturday, she had traveled to Tennessee with Granny to visit her newest great-niece Rayna Lynn. Although it was a coincidence, mom was so happy that she shared the same middle name with Rayna. She joked and said Rayna was named after her. I don’t know about you but I am so happy that Rayna does share the name Lynn because she can carry on the name in our family. As I told Jeffrey on monday, “I’m proud that Rayna can share that name with my mom.” I remember when I told her I planned to marry Joy. She was so happy to finally have a daughter. She was so proud that I chose Joy to be my wife and was so glad Joy was joining our family. That first Christmas together mom bought joy a stocking and various kitchen items that said Joy to the world. She loved to give gifts that had our names in it. Mom could not wait to spoil her grandchildren. I can’t wait to share wonderful memories with my future children about their grandmother who left this earth way too soon but left such a beautiful legacy behind. She wasn't always good at subtle hints. Last Thanksgiving, Joy and I went to her house and there sat a new red rocking chair. Joy looked at me and wondered who/what that rocking chair was for. Mom came into the living room and asked if we had seen it. We said, "yes... who's that for?" Mom responded, "OH! That's for my grandchildren!" There are many things she will miss out on here on earth but I would not ask her to trade her spot in Heaven to continue living in this sinful world.

Lastly, I want you to know that my mom loved her church family at Central Church of Christ. Every time I spoke with her, she would brag about all the wonderful works that they were part of in Athens. One particular time, she called me to tell about a special service where Jerome Williams led singing. She couldn’t stop talking about the singing that day. She was beaming from the wonderful worship through singing that was provided that day. This week I was able to listen to a video she recorded during that service while she was singing. Thankfully, I will have this video to watch from time to time as I remember her beautiful singing voice.

My mom was someone I could be proud of. I have loved reading all the sweet comments on facebook this week left by friends and families. I loved reading about how her beautiful blue eyes would light up when talking about James and I and how proud she was of us. While life has taken us in different directions and new places, we did not talk as much as I would have liked but I always knew she was a phone call away if I needed her. I am so thankful for the time that I did have together with my mom but now God needed her more than I did and she is rejoicing in heaven, smiling her beautiful smile, and singing a beautiful song. She truly was a beautiful woman.

I know that it is difficult to comprehend why someone so young had to leave this life. I know that we are hurting and sad. I know that in the days to come and for the rest of our life we will miss our mom. However, God will provide us strength in the days and years to come. Each day will get better and each day we move closer to seeing mom again. Cast everything on God and He will provide to you a peace which surpasses all understanding while guarding our hearts and minds.

There's so much I want to share but time will not allow. I will miss her smile, her laugh, her singing, and all the wonderful memories that we had together. Even though I will miss her here on Earth, I would never want her to exchange her new eternal home to spend one more day in our temporary home here on earth.

Mom always told me when she passed, she wanted to peacefully pass in her sleep. God took care of her and My mom has been welcomed home. She is waiting to see us and I will live my life everyday looking forward to seeing her and God.

James 4:14 - “Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a but a vapor/a mist/a fog that appears for a little while and then vanishes.”

Life is short. Live your life for today but most importantly live your life for God so that in end others can know about His love, his power, his strength, his forgiveness, and His son. Mom would want us all to be messengers of God just as she was.

Today - love a little deeper, laugh a little louder, hold the ones you love a little tighter and make God the king of your life because tomorrow is not promised.

Dr. Seuss once said, "Dont cry because it's over. Smile because it happened".

Choose to smile even when it's tough and remember mom's beautiful smile.

Until we meet again....

Keep smiling. Keep singing. I love you mom!

Mission Orlando - Day 5

As we woke up to take on the last work day of our mission trip, there was a calm and quietness in the lobby as prayer partners met and faced the reality that the end of such an amazing week was ending. For some of us we were not looking forward to saying goodbye to the kids we had made a connection with. We didn't know how we were going to answer the question that would inevitably come our way, "Are you going to be here tomorrow? Next Week? Next Year?" This was a question that was discussed within our group but without a real answer that we could give them because we knew we wouldn't be back tomorrow or next week, but next year was still up in the air. Nevertheless, we forged on and took on the challenges awaiting us!

After arriving at Concord Street for the last time, we loaded up the bus to head to Second Harvest Food Bank, once again. However, the "open-toe shoe club" decided to conform and join the team by wearing close-toe shoes. Luckily we did not sort through old meat but we sorted through canned goods, baby food, dry foods, juice, etc. that would be packed into boxes, tagged, and placed in areas for distribution. While it feels that we were not doing a whole lot in the way of serving, we understood that we may not ever know the impact we will have in a community or in someones lives. This was a perfect example of that, but we remember "I planted the seed, Apollos watered it, but God has been making it grow" (I Cor. 3:6).

We headed back to Concord Street to have lunch and prepare for our last day at Lake Mann. Today was the day we would present Noah to the kids and we had prayed for the rain to hold off. Let me say, we had beautiful weather all week and the rain usually missed us.

As we arrived to Lake Mann, it began to rain. Was it a coincidence that it would rain on the day we would talk about Noah and the flood? Maybe, but it sure did add to the lesson we were teaching and made it more real for the kids who were there.

Despite the rain, we had kids waiting for us as we arrived, once again. I really saw God in the kids this day because they still came in the rain. Some had umbrellas, some had ponchos, and some just came. What an amazing site to see kids who had the desire to be with us and learn about God that they braved the weather to be there!

As we wrapped up the afternoon, we sang some more silly/VBS songs and the kids kept wanting to sing and kept requesting songs to sing. I had to take a moment and walk away while I had a small cry because these kids did not want us to leave and I did not want to leave them because for a small moment in time we brought some joy, hope, and love to their lives through God's word. What an amazing experience and week.

At one point I was in the restroom and I heard one of the kids singing "If you love Jesus". He had no clue anyone could hear him, but I could and it did my heart good to know we left an impression on these kids that they were wanting to sing about Jesus as they walked home.

We finally finished and afterwards we went to the lady who made the "Flips", so we could buy out the rest of her stock and be a blessing to her by giving back to her monetarily more than she asked for. We hung around and ate our flips, but eventually we had to load the bus back up and leave.

One thing I've learned in doing mission work is that it's never "Goodbye" but "Until we meet again". I believe that we will be back in Orlando to do mission work in the next year or two and I hope to see some of the same kids that we got the pleasure of meeting during the week we were there. I also pray that they live a life, according to God's will, so we can meet again in Heaven one day.

It's amazing how God can touch your life in just a short span. This trip was more of a life-changing experience for me, even though our purpose was to have a life-changing experience for the kids. Our God is truly an awesome God and I urge you to trust that He is prepared to do some amazing things in your life. You don't believe me? Take a mission trip for a week and see if God doesn't change your perspective on the power He has in your life.

How do we raise kids who serve?

                If I asked your kids, what would they say is at the heart of what it means to be part of your family? In other words, how would your kids finish this sentence: “Our family is….”

                I grew up with a very strong sense of what it meant to be a Thompson. We wore our family name with pride, after all, the motto on our family crest was “Nosce teipsum” or translated, “know thyself.” We would never do anything to tarnish the family name, because early on it was instilled in me what being a Thompson meant. Both by their example and by their words, my parents instilled in me that being a part of the Thompson family meant you were hardworking and looked for ways to humbly serve others. Our family is hard-working servants.

                Joy and I hope to instill the same values in our children, one day… a few years down the road. We pray that our family will be leaders and learners, people of gentle strength, content risk-takes, and folks who love and serve God and others. Do we have all the answers? No, and if you are honest with yourself, you don’t have all the answers even now, as a parent or when you did have children.

                A question you may find yourself asking is, “How can we be parents who love and serve God and others, and who raise kids who do likewise?” How can we plant a vision for kingdom service so deeply in our kids that they can’t help but offer love and hope to those in need? Words and Actions.

                I read about a family that shares this longing that their kids have a heart for service. They have made a commitment, as a family, to help folks who are homeless not by giving them money but by buying them a bag of groceries instead. As their three daughters were growing up, the parents explained, “Our family does not give money when we are approached on the street. We buy food instead.” When approached by someone who was homeless, the parents would run into a nearby supermarket and buy a bag of groceries for the person in need, often with their daughters in tow.

                Recently, their seventeen-year-old daughter was heading alone into a grocery store when she was approached by a homeless man who asked her for money. Even though Kristen was alone, she repeated the family mantra to him: “Our family does not give money. We buy food instead.” She walked into the grocery store and spent $17 of her own money to buy groceries. When she returned home, she never asked her parents to reimburse her.

                 Want your kids to grow up and be servants, to love the Lord, and be a productive part of society? Show them. Show your children how to be servants. Show your children that you love the Lord. It’s all about words and actions, and it all starts with you, the parents, in your own home. After all, when your kids grow up, they will be a reflection of you. If you are inconsistent in your spiritual walk, it’s safe to assume your children will be, as well. If you don’t value God, church, and family as a priority in your life, study shows that neither will your children. Live your life in the same way you want your children to live theirs, and you will see a child who loves God and serves others. “Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it.” –Proverbs 22:6

Parent Driven Church: Part 3

We continue with the series on the Parent Driven Church. Our society is moving more and more towards being dependent on ministers and forgetting the groundwork that should be laid in the home so the Youth Minister can supplement that teaching. We need to get back to having a Parent Driven Church and I hope this blog will help you find ways to do exactly that. You can find Part 1 and Part 2 by clicking the link. 

"Parents are usually the most important influence in their kids' lives" - Chapter 6 Stick Family Relationships, Sticky Faith: A Leader's Guide

Did you read that carefully? Parents are an important influence for their kids. As a youth minister, it is sometimes exhausting thinking about the responsibility that I have for the students in our ministry and for their faith (and sometimes lack thereof).While adult role models are important and should be a factor on youth ministry, there is nothing more important when it comes to Faith than the Parents.

Let me provide you with some research. Sociologist, Dr. Christian Smith from the University of Notre Dame conducted a nationwide telephone survey of more than 3,000 teens and their parents, as well as, 267 in-depth interviews and he concluded: "Most teenagers and their parents may not realize it, but a lot of research of sociology of religion suggests that the most important social influence in shaping young people's religious lives is the religious life models and taught to them by their parents."

Yes, there are exceptions but think about it this way. How many hours, on average, does a youth minister spend with your child compared to the hours parents are spending with their children? There is a vast difference in time there. Parents are most certainly the launching pad of their child's faith and because of time spent with them, Parents help to shape, guide, and mold their faith. Don't misunderstand, a Youth Minister's job is very important, as well, the point is Parents need to do a better job at home helping to mold their kids faith.

According to Search Institutes's nationwide study of 11,000 teenagers from 561 congregations, 12% of you have a regular dialogue with their mom on faith/life kids. In other words 1 out of 8 kids talk to their mom about faith. With dads, it is 1 out of 20, or 5%. Approximately 9% of teenagers engage in regular reading of the bible and devotions with their families. Not even 1 out of 10 teenagers are looking at scriptures with their parents.

When you do engage your children in dialogue about their faith, what questions are you asking? Is it the standard, "What did you talk about in church today?" "How was youth group?" "What did you think of the sermon?" and I think we already know the answers to the questions that our teens will respond with. According to Fuller Youth Institute, asking these questions can pay off, but what is really is important is that parents also share about their own faith. It is important that we are not only living out our faith, but talking to our kids about our faith, as well.

There are certain taboo issues that need to addressed and discussed that parents tend to shy away from, and even let the youth minister handle those issues (sometimes with it coming a little too late). For example, according to Kara Powell of FYI, she says, "Two different sets of data indicate that the more important religion (not just Christianity, but also other religions) is to parents, the more difficult it is for those same parents to talk with their kids bout sex." That's pretty disappointing. We have to find a way to have these conversations with our kids in a healthy, balanced, and scriptural way. These conversations help to guide, shape, and mold their faith.

Want to know how we can have a Parent Driven Church? Have a faith driven family that isn't afraid to share or talk about their faith with their kids. Don't avoid taboo conversations and encourage your kids to live out their faith.

*Research found in Chapter 6, "Sticky Family Relationships", in the book Sticky Faith: Everyday ideas to build lasting faith in your kids. Dr. Kara E. Powell and Chap Clark, PhD. 

Evangelism

Every Thursday we have a youth bible study in our home using the Hashtag Video Series "For His Glory" as our material. This week we viewed the video on evangelism and discussed how we can evangelize.

For a 26 year old youth minister, I made the assumption that everyone knew this word "evangelism"; however, to a not yet Christian 6th grader, this word was foreign. So, the question, "What is evangelism?" came up before we even started the video, which was a perfect place to jump in to our discussion. We started from the beginning, defined the term, and talked about how we can use it to reach others before watching the video.

However, this exchange made me think - Are we failing our youth when they do not know what evangelism is? Am I taking their knowledge for granted and skipping over basic things that need to be reinforced? Are they ready for such a topic as Evangelism when they are still growing in their knowledge of who God is and what He does? These questions flooded my mind, then I came up with a simple answer. You are never too young to hear about how we should share God's love with other people, and we are never too old to stop wanting to share God's love with others. There is no age limit on evangelism and yet, we sometimes just skip right over and take it for granted that people understand this concept.

What is our mission? One of the things we focus on in our student ministry is simply the word "Go" which is a concept Jesus used in His ministry and reminds us to do the same.

• GO make disciples of all nations. (Matt. 28:19)

• GO baptize them in the name of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. (Matt. 28:19)

• GO out quickly to the streets and lanes of the city, and bring in the poor and crippled and blind and lame. (Luke 14:21)

• GO out to the highways and hedges and compel people to come in, that my house may be filled. (Luke 14:23)

• GO proclaim repentance and forgiveness of sins to all nations. (Luke 24:27)

• GO be witnesses of these things. (Luke 24:28)

• I chose you and appointed you that you should GO and bear fruit and that your fruit should abide. (John 15:16)

I want our students to have a heart for missions and evangelism, a heart that reaches out to the hurting, a heart that is concerned for the spiritual well-being of others, but we sometimes become so focused on those outside the church that we lose focus on the ones inside the church. We have students in our youth ministry we need to reach out to, parents who are hurting, and adults who are wavering. What are we doing to reach out to them? I challenged our group on Thursday night with this question, "What are you doing to reach out to others in our youth ministry?" The response: silence. No one had ever challenged them to reach out to our own, they had never thought of ways to reach out to them, and they certainly didn't have an answer when they were asked what they were doing. I could see the look in their eyes. It was a look of nervousness because they knew they should be wanting to do more, they just simply have not been doing it. I tossed some numbers at them concerning our ministry and the youth who are a part of it. They were simply astonished realizing that we were not reaching our full potential as a ministry. 

Evangelizing is a 365 day effort, not just an every now and then thing. It sometimes takes the smallest of tasks like simply inviting someone to worship with us, asking them to fellowship with us at an event, asking someone how they are doing, or telling someone they've been missed. Sometimes it simply takes a "Hello" on our part to welcome a visitor. There are a couple of conferences for our young people that specifically focus on evangelism. One in Montgomery, AL at the end of the summer, Southern Evangelism Conference (SEC) and one in South Carolina in November, East Coast Evangelism Conference (ECEC). It is my goal and my aim to take our youth to one of these every year to re-emphasize the importance of evangelism. For 3 days out of the year our youth receive training for 362 days of evangelism!

Let me share with you some tips and encouragement from the ECEC twitter page:

Pray every morning that God will bring someone hungry for the Gospel into your life. Study so you'll be ready when He does! #362evangelism

Going into school is going into one of the biggest mission fields in the world. Are u making a difference? #362evangelism

Invite those u eat lunch with to pray with u to bless ur food. #362evangelism

So, my question to you is simply this, "What are you doing to reach out to others in your school, your family, your church family, your workplace, or your community?"

In 2014...

Sunday I met with my youth committee, which helps me to successfully define our ministry and who we want to be, what we want to see, and what we can improve on. I enjoy the times we have together discussing the future because I am always looking ahead to what's next. Planning and preparing is something I enjoy doing (even though I fail at times) it is enjoyable and to a degree even relaxing for me. I look forward to the future!

However, sometimes God has different plans in store for us and our ministry. I constantly ask Him to show me the way that He wants us to go, to guide my steps, and to give me wisdom in making decisions when it comes to our ministry. I believe our focus always needs to be God-centered. Sometimes we lose that focus in the planning and executing of the plans even if it does involve something spiritual in nature. Are we doing event because we truly believe in the power it will have to help spiritually develop our students? Sometimes I worry that I lose sight in what God truly wants and that I am just filling the calendar with things just to have events. I pray that God is truly at work and giving me the wisdom to plan what is necessary for our student ministry. I also ask God to bring my ministry to the point where we aren't just focused on the students anymore but it is helping families to keep the conversation going at home and we are several working and moving parts, but together as a unit. 

In 2014 I want to be a better minister and husband. I want God to truly direct my steps and to remove any selfish ambition that is in the way of the ministry that God has laid before me. In 2014, I want to be able to touch the heart of each student and their families to supplement their spiritual development. In 2014, I want to see us take a more active approach in the outreach in our communities and make a direct impact on those people. In 2014, I want others to know God by showing them His love through my life. These are things that I desire. However, I want to do what God desires for me, in 2014.